Teacher: Draw A Diagram of Becteria
pappu: Here it is Sir
teacher: Where? U have not draw anything
Pappu: Sir, Can u see Becteria widout Microscope..

1 Jamadaar gutter mein jhuk ker kachra nikal raha tha:

1 pathan wahan se guzartay hue ruk ker bola:



"O yara! 2 Naan amara b laga dena.."

1 Pathan ne Apni Girl Friend ko Kiss kiya or bura sa mun bna k ek side thok diya.



OR kaha


Tum ne amara Naswar ka Maza he kharab kr dia...

1 Larai me Pathan ne Bullet Proof Jacket ki jaga Macher dani pehan rakhi thi..



Poocha: Q...?


Pathan bola: Jis me macher nai gus $kta us me goli kese gusse ga.

Ek Pathan Bachpan se hi Hairan, Pareshan aur Full Tension main tha.......!



Yeh soch kar k meri Behan k 2 Bhai hain, Aur mera 1 bhai kyun.

Teacher: "Al-Bairooni" k Baap ka Naam batao.

Pathan bohat soch kar bola:



"Al-Androoni"

Ek pathan ko school main techear ne kaha:

Translet into english
(Ham Sab Umeed Se Hain)

Pathan:
We are all Pregnant.

Pathan ne Najaiz Ghar Banaya:

Kisi ne Mashwara diya k Ghar k Bahar Chalking kardo ta kay Police samjhay k Purana Ghar hai.


Pathan ne Deewar pe likha...

ANAAR KALI KO REHA KARO.

Phatan ne Doctor ko bohat mara:

Logo ne pocha kyou?


Phatan:
Etni garmi main kehta hy Paani Boil Kar k Piyo.

Teacher: Bary ho kar kya bano gay?

Pathan: Mera Baap kehta hai k Jitna Marzi Parh Lo, Woh nahi ban saktay jo chahtay ho..

Teacher: Tum kya banna chahtay ho?

Pathan: "LADY DOCTOR"

Pathan ka shair:
Na Botal main,Na jaar main.
Na hotel main na Bar main.
Na bike peh, Na car main...
Na Ishq mein, Na pyar mein.

Jo maza hy "NISWAR" mein.

Ek Pathan ki 10 Betiyan thin:

Phir jaa kar usko Ek Beta Hua...

Pathan ne uska Naam kya rakh hoga???





Zaroorat Khan.

Aik dafa pathan ne Peshawar se Lahore call krni thi:

Us ne socha k sab se sasti call konsi parre ge,

Phir Us ne

Peshawar se Lahore aa k local cal ke.

Ek Phatan mobile ki dukan pr gya ur Bola:

Mujhe Kaan main Lagane wala mobile chaheye

.

Dukandar after much thinking
"Aap ka matlab hy Bluetooh Handsfree se hy"

Pathan: Yaar mere dost k abbu foat ho gae Hy main ne use phone krna hy, Par call bohat lambi ho jaey gi.

Sardar: Happy hour on karva k kr lo sasta rahe ga.


Pathan: Oy afssos ki baat "Happy" hour se kese kru?

Reporter: Hakumat ne Sawat & Malakand mutasareen ka bohat help kya
Khana, Pani, Kapre, Camp ko sab kuch dya.




Pathan: Khak help kya! Hukumat ne NASWAR to behja he nhi.

bomb blast k bad Ek pathan ro rha tha.


 Admi: Zakhmi ho? Koe aziz halak ya zakhmi Ho gya hy?


Pathan: Oy! Khocha hmara naswar Shaheed ho gaya hy.

Ek pathan exam dene gaya to saath may PLUMBER ko le kar gaya!

.

Kiun???
.
.
.
Because
.
.
Pathan ko information mili thi k paper Leak hogaya hai.

Pathan Apni Maa se: Kya aapne mujhe paida hony se pehle dekha tha?



Maa: Nahi to...


Pathan: To phir Paida hony k baad aapne mujhe pehchana kese?

Pathan car ki Battery change karwane gaya.

Mechanic: Sahab! Exide ki daal doon?

Pathan: Nahi yaar, dona side ki daal de, warna phir problem hogi.

Pathan: Aaj main bohat preshan hu aur mujhe Dar lag rha hy.

 Sardar: Kyu?

Pathan: Aaj main test de k aya hu pta nhi fail ho ga ya pass.

 Sardar : Kon sa test?

Pathan: Blood Test

Pathan's Wife: Main kapray nichor nichor k thak gayi hon, Tum mujhe ek Spinner kyon nahi dila detay?



Next day Pathan SHAHID AFRIDI ko le aaya.

POLIO Team Darwazay par aai:

Pathan: Bandooq aur Kartoos kahan hain?

Polio Team bhagi...

Peache se Pathan ne Aawaaz di:

Ruko Ye to Hamaray Bachon k Naam hain.

Sardar ne 20/20 match dekhne ka acha intazam kya tha.
Cola, BBQ, LCD, Speakers, Chips.. Match ka maza aagya

Pathan: Lo G khak maza aya
"NASWAR" to tha he nahi.

Pathan: Dr. ne kha hai k muje blood pressure hai Jis ki vaja se muje heart attack b ho sakta hy.

 Pathan Wife : App ko heart Attack nhi aa skta.

Pathan: Kyu?

 Pathan Wife : Wo es lye k app Pathar dil hai.

1 Pathan 2nd Pathan se puchta hai: Yara! Ye kya tum ne Generator main Petrol ki jaga Coca Cola Daal hai?

2nd Pathan: Nahi yara.

1st Pathan: To ye Brrr Brrrrr kyon karta hai??

Pathan Watchman ne Sher (Lion) ka pinjra khula chhor diya..

Officer: Tumne sher ka pinjra lock nahi kya?

Pathan: Kya zaroorat hai, Usko kon chori karega?

Pathan to 2nd Pathan: Yaar koi aisa Gift bata jo teri bhabhi k seedha Dil par lagay.




2nd Pathan: Goli maar day.

Dunya main woh kon si 2 cheezen hain jo ek doosray k baghair nahi reh saktin? Aur dono bekaar hain?

Socho


Aur Socho


Pathan aur Naswaar.

Pathan: Yar me 20/20 match ki shart har gya.

 Sardar: Wo kese?

Pathan: Shart lagi thi k 20/20 match me team 6 GOAL kr ge.
Team ne 1 b GOAL nhi kya srf RUN bnate rhi.

Pathan to Angrez:
Yara ham ne aik aesa cheez ejad kia ha jis ki waja se dewar ki dosri tarf dekh sakte hain.
Angrez heran ho kar,
Khan sab wo kon se cheez hai.
Pathan: sorakh

Pathan Ko Rasty Mei Aladin ka Chragh Mila.
Ragra To 1 Jin nikla or Kaha K Wo UsKi 3 wishes Pori Kray Ga.

Pathan: Hum Ko Aisa Naswaar Do Jo kabi Khatam Na Ho.

1 Naswar Ka Packet A Gya Pathan Nay Thori Si Nswar Nikali To Utni Naswar
or Aa Gayee.

Jin: Baaki 2 wìshes?

Pathan: Aisa 2 Packet or Laa Do.

1 pathan UK gaya,
Airport per Immigration Officer: What is your name?
Pathan: Umar Daraz Khan

Officer: Say in English

Pathan kuch sochne k baad

Long life khan.