Saturday, July 12, 2014

waterproof towel

sardar ji`s Hi Tech Achivements


"waterproof towel"

Expired

why are u burying ur driving license?

It is expired

Haar

aik chor sardar ji ne apni mangertar ko soney ka har lakr dya

mangetar : jan bhala is haar ki kia qeemat hai ?

sardar ji : 3 saal qaid tey beshumar littar ..

Sher ka bacha


Once one sardar and one pathan were traveling in one train. Sardar was trying to open his suitcase to take out his night dress, but he was unable to open it. Pathan came and opened the suitcase and said " Pathan Sher ka bachcha hai" and went off .
After an hour sardar was busy in opening his lunch box, but he could not open it. Pathan came, opened the box and said "Pathan Sher ka bachcha hai" and went off .
After some time sardar was trying to open the door of the toilet but he could not. Again Pathan came and opened it with one kick and said " Pathan Sher ka bachcha hai"
This time sardar became angry he asked pathan "oye mujhee ek gal bata, teri ma jungle gayi thi ya sher tere ghar aaya tha?" and went off

fool


A sardarji with a big bandage in his left hand told his friend (not a sardar) that his hand was caught in the machine in the factory.
"oh!" exclaimed the friend and said "If it had happened to the right hand you would have suffered triple than this"
"I am not a fool" said the sardar. "First the position was that only my right was about to get caught...I instantly pulled it out and gave my left hand inside"

wash basin


A sardarji goes to a hotel and eats heartily. After eating he goes to wash his hands but starts washing the basin instead. The manager comes running and asks him, "Prahji, aap kya kar rahe ho?"
To this sardarji replies, "oye, tumne hi to idhar board lagaya hai, Wash Basin"

Family

One fine day a girl proposed to a sardar and the sardar denied simply saying that in our family we marry only our relatives my mom married my dad, my brother married my bhabhi, my uncle married my aunt and so on. so please excuse me !!!!!

phone number

The sardarni asked his lover, Santa Singh, "Sardar darling, if we get engaged will you give me a ring?". "Sure", said Sardar, "what's your phone number?"

Hot Bath


Sardar: "My doctor told me to drink carrot juice after a hot bath to cure my cold."
pathan: "Does it work?"
Sardar: "I don't know... I can never finish drinking the hot bath."

bill


Sardar: My mobile bill how much?
Call centre: Sir, just dial 123 to know current bill status.
Sardar: Stupid, not CURRENT BILL my MOBILE BILL.

stop imagination


Interviewer: Just imagine you are on the third floor, and it has caught fire, so how will you escape?
Sardar: Its simple. I will stop my imagination!

Gandhi Jayanti


Lecturer: Write a note on Gandhi Jayanti
So Sardar writes - Gandhi was a great man, but I don't know who is Jayanti.

foreigner


After returning from a foreign trip, sardar asked his wife - Do I look like a foreigner?
Wife: No! Why?
Sardar: In London a lady asked me “are you a foreigner?”

100 Letters


Manager asked sardar at an interview.
-Can you spell a word that has more than 100 letters in it?
Sardar replied: P-O-S-T-B-O-X.

Small Babies


One tourist from U.S.A. asked Sardar:
Any great man born in this village?
Sardar: No sir, only small babies!!!

Java interview attended by Sardarji


Q. Explain 2 tier and 3 tier architecture ?
A. Two wheelers like scooters will have 2 tyres and auto rickshaws will have 3 tyres.

Q. I want to store more than ten objects in a remote server? Which methodology will follow?
A. Send it through courier.

Q. Can I modify an object in CORBA?
A. As you wish, I do not have any objections.

Wednesday, July 9, 2014

To Main Batata


To Main Batata..
Ek Kutta pathan k piche laggaya
Pathan Gussey me Bolta howa bhaga
Khocha agar tere Bap ka Hakumat nahi hota to tujhe Batata???

Common Baatain


Pathan or Gadhe me 3 Batien Common hain
1) Bachpan me Dono bhi Khubsurat The.
2) Bachpan se hi Mehnati hote hn
3) Bare ho kr Dono Transport ka Kaam kerte hai.

Khawab


Pathan ne oxford universty mein 1st Rank Me Aaya. News channel walu ne pucha..
Ab Aaghe Kya Karoge ?
Pathan : bachpan se ek khwab Dekha Hai apna tandoor Center kholu ga...

Yaar

Yaar
Pathan: Mera yaar aaya hai chai to bana do.
Wife:
Mein nahi bana rahi.
Pathan

Bana de jab tera yaar aaye ga to mein b bana doonga.

Chand


Pathan Public Toilet Gaya to Deewar Pe Likha Tha: 

"Dunya Chand Pe Pohnch Gai 

Aur Tum Yahan Bethe Ho?" 


Pathan Ne Neeche Likh Diya: 

"Bas Ye Kar K Hum Bhi Ja Raha Hai"

Thursday, July 3, 2014

Baap


Accident hua,Bahot bheed thi..
Sardar ko dekhnr ka mauka nahi mil raha tha,
.
CLVER SANTA:-
" Ye mera BAAP hai "
Bheed pichhe hati to dekha kutta maraa tha..

Bajrang


Doctor:which soap u use?
sardar: Bajrang soap,bajrang paste,Bajrang brush.
Dr.Is Bajrang an internationall company?
sardar: No bajrang is my room Partner..

'Incorrect


Smartst thing sardar ever did,

He changed all his passwords to 'Incorrect'
so whnever he forgets,the computer will remind him,
.
Your password is 'Incorrect'

dinner


Shadi me 1 pathan bohut dair tuk

khana kha raha tha,

kisi ne pocha kab tuk khao gay?
...
Pathan:me to khud kha-kha k dukhi hon,

per kia karon card me likha tha Dinner 7 to 10PM.

susar


Sardar Pathan Se: Yaar meri saas k birthday hay koi sasti aur achi antique cheez batao jo ussay don.

Pathan: O khucha, aisa karo humara Sussar de do.

Train


Aik Train ulatnay ka Case Adalat mein tha.

Train ka Driver jo ke Pathan tha,

Us se Poocha ke tumne Train Patri se kiu Utarai??

Pathan: O yaara aik banda samnay aa gaya tha to brake marne ka time nahi tha.

Hamara Assistant ne bola ke is ke oper char ha do.

Wakeel: Phir?

Pathan: Bas woh banda Patri se utar gaya..!

Goli


Pathan: Khudkushi per taqreer kar raha tha.

Jazbati ho kar kehne laga,

Khudkushi Haram hai,

Zulm hai,

Gunah hai,

Is se behter hai ke insan apne aap ko Goli maar de...

rickshay


Aik pathan apne rickshy k sath khra tha
aik aadmi aya or pucha: khan bhai iqbal town jao ge?

Khan: mei to chla jaunga lakin mere rickshay ka kon khayal rakhega?

naam


1 Pathan Sharab peetay huay ro raha tha,

Kisi ne pocha khan sab ro Q rahe ho??

Pathan: Jis Larki ka naam bholana chah raha hn us ka naam yaad nahi aaraha hai

Kuttey per mazmoon


Teacher: Oye Tumko KUTTEY par Mazmoon

Likh kar Laney ka kaha tha?

Pathan: Hum kya karey, jab Hum ne KUTTEY par Pen rakha tö wo Hamara tang par
Kaat krar bhag gaya.

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